So I'm walking up the path to my apartment steps just a second ago and you know what I did?
I fell in a bush. A big bush. And not just toppled over sideways a little bit. My knees collapsed and I fell into a big heap inside the bush. With all my bags. All layed up on my side.
And then I look out. And there is a boy standing at the stairs just down from me, staring at me blankly. I'm certain he thought I was intoxicated. I was super embarrassed. And then I waited for him to walk up the stairs before I got up, because I didn't want him to know that I lived on the 2nd floor. Geeze.

Just thought I'd share that little tidbit...I'm so stinkin clumsy.

Tonight I rode up to Trussville with Danielle to meet Christian where we then preceeded on to the Basement. It has been an absolutely incredible night of goodness.

If you have never heard of it before, the Basement is this gathering, primarily of young people, that began in this guy's basement and has grown to thousands. They love Jesus and they worship their stinkin hearts out. It is intense. It is a little hokey at times. It is crazy fun. And it's insanely real. and cool. and relevant.

We mostly hung towards the back.
There was absolutely no place to sit, and we were still trying to check it all out and get a real feel for what this place was like.
Once things started rolling though, you couldn't help but get caught up in it all.
I wish so badly that I would have had my notebook with me because there was so much that I wanted to record.

On the way home it was pretty late and Danielle and I had planned on jamming out to some Rascal Flatts so that we could both stay awake...didn't happen. We got started talking about Captivating. [Our sleepover is this weekend, which I am super stoked about.] We were wrapping up the planning stuff, perfecting grocery lists, and throwing around some pretty nifty ideas. It was so affirming and encouraging. I'm super excited about the year and the changes we're bringing to Captivating. There is so much opportunity there for it to be something...something amazing. Something unique. Something life-changing. I'm accountable to that.

We talked about Captivating all the way to the IC where I had left my car...and then, instead of getting out, we just stayed...and we talked Jesus. Danielle and I have had some semi-spiritual conversations in the past, but never...never have we talked Jesus.

See I have this problem...this wall complex, as I like to call it. I'm just not very transparent. I don't like being vulnerable. I don't like giving up control. And for the most part, I'm an introvert. I have to be pushed to the point of opening up...it's not that I don't want to...it's just that I need to be nudged. And except for rare, serious circumstances, I don't seek it out. I wait on it. And I relieve myself in other, unhealthier ways.
Danielle is the same way. We have the same issues when it comes to vulnerablity and difficult, personal topics. It makes it difficult for those conversations to ever take place, because we're both waiting on the other person to push.

Tonight there was no push...there was just give...on both sides. And in the midst of that give, we both realized that we were starving for the same thing. We're both looking for the same relief...and although it's not something we can really get from each other...it's something we can help each other find...it's something we can push one another to seek out. And so we just sat there. And talked. And listened. And nodded because we really, truly did understand and empathize. And we cried...not really...because neither of us really cry in front of people...but we watered.

It was such an answer for what I've been begging God for...and it's strange because it was not at all the answer I'd been looking for. [Which is what I talked about at youth last week, which is cool in it's own right...] But I had asked God to send me something...and instead, he sent me someone walking the same, exact path...thirsting after the same exact thing...so that we could seek it out together. Wow.

And I don't know why...I don't know what...not yet. But I know there's a reason for it. I know that this is step one and that it's required before there can be a second step...

And so I'm just kind of in awe...because I know it now. And I'm ready to take the second step. Blindly...but with a buddy by my side.

I want to worship.